20 Ways to Break Up

Have you had enough of your boyfriend or girlfriend? Look no further for a list of respectful, tactful ways to end your relationship.

  1.  “It’s not you, it’s me. Just kidding. It’s you.”
  2. Text them a poop emoji next to “gtg forever.”
  3. “Sorry, my mom said I’m not old enough to date.” This works regardless of your age.
  4. Give them deodorant and say, “This relationship stinks, and so do you.”
  5. Give them a broken ring to symbolize an anti-proposal.
  6. Public Twitter mention.
  7. Change your Facebook relationship status to single without telling them. They’ll get the message.
  8. “Our Zodiac signs aren’t compatible.”
  9. “Knock-knock? Who’s there? Not me. I won’t be coming over anymore. Sorry.”
  10. Write them a fun breakup limerick.
  11. Scream Drake lyrics into their ear into they break up with you.
  12. Wait until you’re at the altar and object to your own wedding.
  13. Find the power outlet where they’re charging their phone. Pull the plug, saying, “This is our relationship.”
  14. “My horoscope thought it was best.”
  15. Hire a skywriter and have it written across the heavens.
  16. Send them an email with a link to a WikiHow article on how to break up. Make the subject title, “Ideas?”
  17. Blame the stock market crash of 1929. Somehow.
  18. Tell them it was your New Year’s resolution.
  19. Give them Hershey hugs instead of Hershey kisses.
  20. Sing it in High School Musical lyrics.



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