I Want To Be Beautiful

I’ve been thinking a lot about beauty recently, specifically my own. I’m not sure why. Well, actually I do. I have one school year left, and then I’ll be out on my own. I’ll be an adult. Yet, here I am, still looking like I’m 14 years old. I look back on selfies from two years ago, and they look exactly the same. Most people have these transformations, but they never happened for me.  Isn’t there a point where you stop looking like you’re 14?

I don’t want to hear, “Oh, you’ll appreciate it when you’re 30 years older!” I know I will, but I want to live my life right now. I’m trying to live in the moment, not just look forward to things years down the road. I do enough of that already.

It’s not just an annoyance anymore; no, I’m actually angry about it. I want to leave high school looking different from when I started. I want to look beautiful. I’m tired of “cute” and “adorable” being the only compliments I ever get on my appearance. Can’t I be beautiful? Why do I have to be just cute? I’m not even trying to look 30. I just want to look like I’m not fresh out of middle school. I just want to be able to ask for a guy’s number without looking like a little girl. I want to be taken seriously. 

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2 thoughts on “I Want To Be Beautiful

  1. The thing is… beauty is idealized. It’s a burning desire that consumes many girls, including me. There are made up rules of beauty, that are so strict that as much as you try you can’t be truly classified as beautiful. But what they forget is that there’s as much beauty in a daisy as in a rose. Flowers are all beautiful and just because they differ from each other doesn’t create one more beautiful than all the others. The same can be said of humans… and your beauty may be like a lavender and as much we want to be a rose, we’re not… but that doesn’t make us any less beautiful just uniquely gorgeous. To further my analogy… beauty isn’t always all about looks… like a rose has thorns can be compared to those outright gorgeous people who are just downright awful… and a tulip could just be an average pretty person with sweet heart.

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